Training for a 100 miler can be fun but after a while, it becomes work. WORK! I am tired of work!
The whole idea of training for a 100 miler (or any race!) is stress and recover. You need to stress the body but then you need to recover. I have been stressing my body for weeks. Doing 50 miles a week, running back-to-back 20 milers, racing with a cold, keeping the pressure on. Every day...do I run? How far? How hard? Where? I am losing the fun.
But, I am getting close to the end of training. This week will be easy and then next Saturday is a 50K. Then I get to recover. I want to recover. I want to have fun with running, want to be impulsive, not tied to a training schedule.
But, the doubt is sneaking in. THERE IS NO WAY IN HELL I CAN RUN A 100 MILER. Why not? Because I don't have the motivation. Why did I sign up for this ridiculous race? Why do people run 100 milers? Why in the world did I think this was a good idea? Think about it: I will hurt all over. I will be chafed all over. I will be exhausted. Hungry. Thirsty. Exhausted. Totally and completely exhausted. Why would I put myself through that? I don't even like getting up early. Why would I skip a whole night's sleep?
Because, no woman 60 years or over has completed this race. I will have the record. I will be the first. Good heavens, does my ego rule my world? Evidently it does.
This is not the time to make decisions about going or dropping out. This is the time to start recovering.