Even older

This Dusty Ole Gramma is getting even older. Yep, another birthday. Entering a new age group. Time to pick some races and take home some medals, right?

It is winter and this is the time of year when picking a race schedule is so much fun. You think you can do anything....when it is the off season. How about a couple of hundred milers? Sure, I can do that. Multi-day events? No problem. Multi-sport events? You betcha!

I finally made a decision: Big Horn 100 http://www.bighorntrailrun.com/. I've done the 50K twice. I've done the 50M twice. Time to step it up. My plan had been to run Leadville this year. They seem to have really screwed up though by letting too many people in the race. And Leadville is a huge production with numerous crew stops, no place to stay, etc.

Big Horn is smaller and simpler. And harder? Maybe. It seems that people are more independent. Sure, you can have pacers. You can have crew meet you a couple places along the course. But overall, 100 milers seem to just go out and do it.

Let the training begin!!!!

Going Feral

There's a herd of horses that roam just north of Albuquerque. They are quite beautiful. People call them the Wild Horses of Placitas. But they're not wild. They are just feral.

How long did it take these horses to go from livestock to feral (to wild)? How long would it take me? 

Yesterday I needed to grade papers, go to meetings, and prepare an exam for a class. I needed to get up, eat my breakfast, pack my lunch, take a shower, and change into presentable clothes (a shirt with a collar and pants with a crease). Instead, I put the dogs in the back of the truck and headed to a trail head I've only gone to a couple of times. Embudito Trail is well-traveled, but someone showed me a much less used trail that runs from the same trail head. I purposely left my water at home. No food, no water means a run of 90 minutes or less.

But the morning was fantastic. I was in shorts and a short sleeve shirt. I headed up. And Up and Up. I made it to where the ground was frozen. I thought that this trail would connect to the main trail so I kept going. The dogs were having a blast. I was having a blast. Someone has found rocks that are heart-shaped and placed them along the trail. One is placed in a tree, where a heart would be. Others are on boulders or just by the trail. I was following my heart!! 

I met a man who was hiking down. He looked at me like I had appeared out of thin air. He had on hat, gloves, a jacket, hiking boots and long pants. He was using hiking poles. He asked where I was headed. I told him that I thought the trail would connect up to Embudito. He politely told me that it wouldn't. Instead, if I continued on my way, I would end up at the crest, where "the trail is really icy....you don't want to go there without poles." That was almost enough to convince me to proceed. Almost.

Knowing that if I continued, I would end up running for a good four hours, I turned around. We blasted down the hills, Scout tripping Sadie more than once. I do love to watch them chase and dodge. My one hour run turned into almost 3. I was thirsty and hungry but, oh how I wanted to continue to the crest and head north. Maybe if I had, I would have met up with the wild horses of Placitas.

An email was waiting for me. An emergency meeting of the administrative team had been called to discuss the lack of funding and the increased teaching load.

I don't even need to say that I would rather be feral...... 

Change of Seasons

I absolutely love fall but I dread what is coming. Cold mornings, dark evenings, long weeks and short weekends.

Racing season (for me) is officially over. I had a good ride. Amazing recovery from foot surgery. I know it is time to sit back, recover, refuel, WORK, and kick back a little. It is hard to let go of the racing; hard to not have a goal.

Last time I wrote I was seriously considering running Leadville again. Now, not so sure. From what I've heard and what I've read, the race is too crowded and disorganized. One of the things that was so neat about  it was the homey feel. But it appears that is gone. Too many horror stories. Maybe I will look for a different 100 miler. Maybe I will stick with 50's. I have at least until January to ponder possibilities.

Meanwhile, I have two dogs who need to get out and explore the trails. Hopefully there will be snow. Hopefully there will be crisp days and blue skies.

Summer is almost over...waaaaa!

It has been quite a year. My first year in the desert, in Albuquerque, teaching for New Mexico State, and being sponsored by... oh wait, of course I don't have a sponsor!

And that is just fine.

I have had the bejeezus scared out of me recently. Sadie, Scout and I ran up Embudo for about 3 miles. That meant we got to turn around and run DOWN Embudo. I love running down hill. I was cruising as fast as my old legs could take me. I cam around a switchback and realized that my foot was on course to land on a snake. How can a person change direction in mid air? I don't know but I missed the snake by a couple of inches.
Now that snake was about 3 feet long with a pattern on its back. I quickly glanced on that head...a beautiful head!! A beautiful snake. In other words, non-poisonous.

Once I recovered enough to breath, I started off down the hill again, but a bit more slowly this time. And that was good because about 10 steps further on I saw another snake. This time, there was no need to examine it. I KNEW it was a rattlesnake. Again, about 3 feet long but much fatter than the gopher snake I had just avoided. This scared the crap out of me (ok, not literally).  This snake was stretched out across the trail and both dogs were on the other side. I guess they just ran right over it. When I stopped, they decided they'd better come back and check on me. NOOOOOOO, I yelled. Sadie came trotting up the trail towards me. She was just about to step on it but it moved its head to look at her. She jumped to the side, right into a prickly pear cactus. Then Scout figured she'd better join us. She walked right over it. It looked at her but didn't strike. It then slithered off the trail.



Ya know, that was way too close.  That was way scary. I really really didn't like that.

Pikes Peak or Bust

It has been quite a summer! Whooohooo (or "woot" as the cool people now say)!! I have so enjoyed my running. So many trails, so many wildflowers, friends, dogs, mountain highs and river lows. I don't feel old today!

I reminded Linus that he had called me a dusty ole gramma. He look chagrined. He said I am not a dusty ole gramma. I am a nice gramma. I feel redeemed. Actually, Linus can be a tough cookie. We had some real butting of heads last year. But now, he is ready to start kindergarten and he is a much easier little guy.

I spent two days with the grands last week. Avery, Elise and I ran a couple miles together. Elise did great. Avery did fantastic. Wish I could run with them often.

Now I am thinking about Leadville 100 for 2014. I set a goal of running it every even year until at least 2014, when I will be 60. Few women over 60 have successfully completed it. Who knows how many will make it this year (we will find out tomorrow at 10:00 AM). I missed 2012 due to surgery. I have not really felt committed to the task, but now I am thinking about it. I will need to sign up in January  if I want to do it. It is not cheap.The entry fee is substantial, enough so that you don't sign up "just in case I decide to do it." I have asked a couple of people to help crew and pace. They are excited about it. So, maybe I will!

Mixing running and human rights

I completed the San Juan Solstice. I actually (is "actually" actually necessary) finished 20 minutes faster than I did 6 years ago. The conditions were perfect this year: stream crossings were very low, no snow fields, no lightning, no storms, not too hot, not too cold. The only real threat was smoke from a massive forest fire not far from the Continental Divide. 

What occupied my attention for 14 hours and 46 minutes (besides how good dinner was going to taste)? Prior to the start, I was talking with a couple of people: One man from Brooklyn and one woman from Virginia. And then there was me. We were chatting about races we have done "back east." She (M from VA) mentioned the race series put on my David Horton. I grimaced and said I wouldn't run his races because of his promotion of certain religious statements (his beliefs that are not just personal, but also political). She said, "Yeah,  but he has done a lot for trail running." T (from Brooklyn) said that we shouldn't mix running and religion or politics. He said that Horton is just promoting the values of his workplace. T said, "You know, he doesn't have a choice." I shot back, "Neither do I." Both T and M looked uncomfortable but stuck by their earlier statements: don't mix politics/religion and running.

So, that occupied my mind for a large portion of the race. As Mary Ann pointed out, this issue doesn't personally affect T or M, so they can easily dismiss Horton's intolerance. But when do people take a stand? When is running a particular race less important than supporting human rights? 

It would be easy to compare this exchange to the famous argument about those who failed to stand up to the Nazis (Martin Niemoller: "First they came for the socialists..."). There is one very important difference between the evangelicals and the Nazis: the Nazis wanted to kill all of those who were impure (Jews, gays, lesbians); the evangelicals only want to get rid of these people by converting them, ie by changing who they are. 

Yes, I admit this is an over-the-top comparison. But then again, after living in the same city with Fred Phelps and his parishioners and their blatant hatred of gays and lesbians, I sometimes get a bit defensive. For me, I will continue to run races that are not associated with intolerance.

Will I Finish or am I finished?

We runners are a very self absorbed lot, with our plans, our training, our races, our mileage, our equipment, our food, our FEET. I have often rationalized that being obsessed with the details of something which really does not matter (my completing the race affects only me and only for a short time) helps me deal with the "real" problems in life.


I have been spending my time the past few weeks suffering from self doubt regarding my ability to complete the San Juan Solstice 50 miler. OK, finishing or not finishing...not a big deal really. Not nearly as important as poverty, child abuse, gay rights, gun control, etc, etc.

I did a quick assessment of my recent running: since 2009, I have "failed to complete" five 50 milers. In one, I switched to the 25 mile option, in another I became hopelessly lost and had to hitch a ride back to town and in a third I failed to make a cut off. The others? I was too hot or too cold. This is becoming a habit.

I never used to DNF. If I started a race, I finished the race unless I was injured. I finished one 50 miler without being able to keep food down beginning at mile 13! I finished a 40 miler with a sprained ankle, and a 25 miler 5 weeks after a hysterectomy.

Now I am obsessing over not finishing. I have begun telling myself that if I quit another race, it means I am done. If I do not finish, I am finished. I am too old, too dusty, too weak-willed. A couple of friends on facebook just DNF'ed 100 milers. They have a slew of comments on their attempts. I'll give you a sample:

• It takes a lot of courage to gut it out for as long as you did in those conditions and then make the SMART move to know when to fold em' as the Gambler once said.
• you are awesome!! No one else does that. That's just amazing to me!! 
• you always amaze and inspire me! Rock on!
• That was an incredible effort with superb training benefits. I know you will put the experience to good use
• You're not just a great runner, you're smart too. 
• Hey that is Awesome...75 miles...omg! So proud of you!
• You had the courage to say yes to running 100 miles and you started... that's the victory. You rock
• u should be proud of what you did accomplish, and to run 50 miles through that terrain is mind boggling. You are always an inspiration and I send you three cheers - hip hip hooray, hip hip hooray, hip hip hooray!! 
• What an accomplishment!! Enjoy the rest of your vacation!

Now don't get me wrong. I understand the need to support a friend who has just had to abandon a goal. but is it ok to drop out of a race?

As Yoda said: Do or do not, there is no try. If I "do not" finish this race, do I switch to "do not"? Am I finished?